Tuesday, August 07, 2007

On the Right Track

Blogged about how other people picked on my single-blessedness status a few days ago. I was never affected by it actually. I was just amused at other people's reaction knowing that i, at 29, is still single and unattached. I was also surprised on why having a lovelife would weigh heavier than having a career. Tsk tsk! With this kind of perception that most people have, i would never wonder why a lot of kids grow hungry and uneducated. They can't be fed or sent to school by their parents' love for each other. My principle is, Love can make you happy alright but it can never relieve hunger pangs.

I am never cynical about love or having a relationship. It's just that everything has its own right time. I believe that you dont hurry love. You have to plan it like planning your own career. I realized that, despite other people's comments on my present status, i am on the right track. I prioritized my "career move" eversince and i never regret it. This was even more strengthened when i had an opportunity to talk with an old friend, now my junior intern, this afternoon.

This post is not intended to pick on her current, miserable life. I am just thankful that at least, i was guided by the Great Architect's hands as to the path that i would choose to tread. I was given the wisdom as to the decisions that i was going to take. For you see, we were classmates in premed days. As a matter of fact, we belonged to the same peer group. Peer groups in college dont usually last long though for this is already the time when you have developed your own character and principle. We actually clicked. We had almost the same outlooks and views in life. We both wanted to pursue our medical education. We both prioritized our own families. I wouldnt be in her company if we didnt have the same principles back then.

We lost touch when we were in medical school. I dont know what happened to her then. After both of us were away from our different families, her principles weakened. I just heard that she had a boyfriend while in medical school and that she was financially supporting her own boyfriend who was younger than she was. Was it because she felt panicky after realizing that her body clock's ticking and that she's getting older without a boyfriend? She failed several times in medical school maybe because of her divided time. Her parents didnt even know about the relationship. Goodness! I really cant understand why you have to make that extent of sacrifice in return of having a relationship!

To make the long story short, she got pregnant, uhmmmm, to make it more complicated, not from his boyfriend but from her 2nd boyfriend who eventually left her and her baby without a trace. She's still in medical school, and was bound to be expelled from their house by her own mom. Her parents are filing for a legal separation for they are divided as to their stand on how to deal with her. I was talking to a different lady this afternoon. I could no longer find the strength that she possessed a few years ago. She was in tears, with a spirit that's almost crushed. I was talking to her not as her senior, i was once again a friend. I was so sorry for what she's currently experiencing. I was speechless and at a loss for words. I couldnt think of the right words to say to comfort her. I carefully picked all the words of encouragement and comfort that ive delivered. In the first place, i was critical of her choices in life that i just couldnt judge her for what she's going through right now.

In the end, i simply asked her. "Did you regret everything that happened?" She answered with a nod. She felt guilty for her family's condition. She felt sorry for her siblings and for her parents. The thing that struck me the most though was when she told me that she felt things to be okay when she sees her baby.

Life is really just a matter of priorities. It doesnt mean that the thing that makes one happy would give happiness to another. It doesnt mean too that what one is lacking off would make the other person long for it. I could only tell if im on the right track when i feel happy and i feel right. I learned this from her. She might have experienced that bad fall but she learned to rise from it. Everything might have screwed up but there's this tiny living creature that made it all right.

4 comments:

snglguy said...

The worst thing one can experience other than an unwanted pregnancy is being disowned by the very people who are supposed to be by your side in times of crisis... hope your friend is ok now.

AngelMD-No-More said...

i also hope that she is...havent seen her today...i really am sorry for her.

vernaloo said...

a woman should know how to fall in love without losing herself. nothing wrong in having a relationship while pursuing a career because it has its benefits but we always have to think that it has to bring out the best in you not the worst.

I hope you're friend will bounce back soon. I just wished her family was there for her. I mean I can only imagine how difficult it is without having the people you love around you in your lowest low. Sad and tragic :(

AngelMD-No-More said...

yep! korek ka gid verns...i really feel sorry for her. this is what im also wishing for her...i just hope that when our time comes to fall in love with the mr right, we will not be stupefied...hehe