Sunday, February 22, 2009

The Appeal

I WAS a self-confessed cry baby. I cried over sappy movies. I cried everytime my parents would reprimand me for a wrong doing. I cried over small stuffs. All these I admit were happening in the past. As I grew older and became more mature in experience, I learned to control my tear dams. I learned to choose the things that deserve my precious tears. I still am a cry baby – a more disciplined cry baby. Disciplined for I only let my tears dams open when I’m alone. I only cry when noone is watching.

This is not a sappy post. It’s just that recently, I always cry myself to sleep. PMS? Geez! It’s too early to implicate my monthly PMS again. Homesickness? Nah! I don’t think I am that homesick that I would cry over it. Lovelife related? Not even. I might miss my Morphine but not enough to let my tear ducts function. Toxicity with work? I can’t remember a time that toxicity with work would put me into tears.

Brace yourselves. I don’t want to sound preachy here but there’s just one thing that break my tears dam open. Yep! Even in public. What more when I’m alone? Every time I remember how blessed I am, I can’t help but cry. Every time I remember those answered prayers, I would always feel this painful thing in my chest that can only be relieved by crying. This is how shallow I am.

Now, is this rationalization again enough why I wanted a place to stay here in Manila where I could be alone? You see, most of the places here offer bed spaces and I’m not really used to this kind of set-up especially if I will be sleeping with a stranger. My autism requires a place where I could be on my own. I could cry without someone wondering what’s happening to me. Where I could cry without someone sympathizing for what I’m feeling for in reality, I cry out of gratefulness and happiness and not of something worth sympathizing.

I’m soooo comfortable in this apartment where I am in right now. I’m staying here for free but the place is just too big for me and the actual rent if the owner is not my friend, costs almost all of my monthly stipend (which might come soon and when I say soon, 6 months from now would be the earliest.hehehe) Maybe tonight I could cry over this concern. I would ask the Great Architect to give me a very good place to stay. If He’s going to let me stay in this place, then may He touch the owner to let me rent this place at a very cheap price. I am just a poor fellow. Other general practitioners earn way way better than I do. I believe that I’m too loved by Him though that He can’t help but grant this petty request of mine.


Actually, this is an appeal to my dear friend (you know who you are). I would even want to provide a link here to his blog. For privacy reasons though, I decided not to. He reads my posts and I know he can read this. You’ll know who he is if he can’t help but leave a comment in my comment box.hehe

Dear friend, have a heart. Do me good and you’ll have good karma all your life.haha How’s our deal going? Can I hear a yes? *wink wink*


sheng said...

Aba ang ganda ng parinig ah, dinaan sa blog post, haha.

dear friend, sige na, ibigay mo na sa kanya yung place in a cheap price, yung reasonable naman na both of you hindi lugi, cge na, friends naman kayo eh. Hahaha.

Ayan, naki-parinig na ako with you, sana nga the Great Architect will let you get the place na.

Reena said...

haha. galing ah. so this person actually reads your blog? :)

sana nagpost ka na rin ng picture mo na umiiyak para masmaconvince mo sya.

i hope you get that apartment!

Walking on Water said...

being on your own can be totally unnerving. being new in this hospital is terrifying.
so if you need anyone to help you with anything, let me know. i'll do what i can.=)

AngelMD-No-More said...

sheng: hahaha friends talaga tayo...thanks for helping me out in my cause.hahaha

reena:haha he follows my blog reen so there's no way that he can't read this.hahaha peace j. yep yep hope he'll let me stay here for good 2 years.hehe

drawow: wow! parang nag rarhyme ha? unnerving...terrifying...anything.hehehe thanks thanks a lot...I will never hesitate to text you or give you a ring should things get out of control. thanks again chief!hehehe

Garando said...

Me too! I will support you!

AngelMD's friend, here is a recent photo of me asking for your consideration in letting her rent your apartment at drop-dead prices.

I hope this will help convince you so you get your dose of good karma.

Reena said...

hey. i tagged you nga pala. i don't know if you've done this tag yet. gawin mo nalang during your free time. kung meron man. hehe. or during your laundry time. haha

AngelMD-No-More said...

garando: hahaha thanks manong! btw, ive good news...we talked last night and i guess our appeal was heard.hehe

reena: thanks reen. ill try check it out. i guess it's like the one that's circulating in facebook nowadays.hehehe

Rudy said...

What?? You crying your heart out? Somehow, that is quite hard to believe. Anyways, welcome back to the noisy, chaotic Manila. :-)

AngelMD-No-More said...

rudy: hahaha quite hard to believe? why so?hehehe thanks for welcoming me to "the jungle."hehe

sheng said...

I miss your posts doc!